6 Ways to Combat Unhealthy Guilt

/ Mental Health / By

Guilt is a feeling or emotion that alerts us when our actions or inactions have caused or might cause harm to another person. Furthermore, feelings of guilt can both be healthy and unhealthy. Similarly, while healthy guilt allows you to treat others with respect and do your part, negative feelings of guilt can interfere with your emotions and quality of life. In fact, according to the American Psychiatric Association’s DSM-5 diagnostic criteria, excessive or inappropriate guilt is a symptom of clinical depression.

In addition, there are many things you can do to release yourself of unhealthy guilt. Though it takes practice and intentional changes to change your thought process. Here are a few tips and tools to help.

1. Look for evidence

Firstly, it’s important to figure out whether your guilty feelings are appropriate or not. If you feel like you’re neglecting your kids, partner, or family, write out a list of all the things you do for them. Use it as a reminder that you’re doing enough.

2. Be direct and get more information

Secondly, directly ask the people you think you’re neglecting whether or not they feel neglected. Determine if they’re expecting too much of you and aren’t taking responsibility for themselves. It’s important to create a balance for everyone.

3. Appreciate yourself and all that you do

Thirdly, every day, write down three things you did to help yourself or someone you care about. At the end of the week, review everything you wrote down as a reminder.

4. Look for the emotions underneath the guilt

Fourthly, oftentimes, guilt masks other emotions like anger, intimidation, and resentment. Analyze the situation and your feelings to determine whether there are any underlying emotions and feelings.

5. Decide how much you’re willing and able to do

Fifthly, set your limits as to how much you’re willing to do and communicate this with your friends, family, partner, and kids. If you feel like you aren’t doing enough, then make a commitment to do more going forward.

6. Realize it’s ok to take care of yourself

Finally, it’s important to remember that you can’t do it all. Your needs are just as valid than those of your partner, child or friend. Take the time to take care of yourself too.

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